85% of couples conceive in the first year, I am not one of them

Archive for January, 2013

Inching Along, so far so good

I’ve been in blog hibernation! There isn’t much really going on. Contrary to popular belief and chatter on baby forums, being pregnant isn’t overly interesting. How I feel this week is basically the same as how I felt last week, and the week before. Also since this is an infertility blog I struggle with how to handle posting from now on. Of course I will continue updating on baby #1’s progress, and come back to the trenches for baby #2.

I’m 11 weeks today and I’ve actually been feeling better lately. I guess when you get to the end of the first trimester a lot of your symptoms start to fade away. It scares me though. Symptoms are a view into what’s going on in my uterus, and without them I feel blind.

I’ve also realized that it’s very hard to make the transition from infertility treatments to pregnant. Trying to use my birth club or other baby forums just make me feel out of place. Like these women have no concept of struggle or having to worry about anything in their entire life. If you’re familiar with reddit, and r/infertility specifically, I created the spin off subreddit for infertility pregnancies called r/infertilitybabies. It’s done wonders for not feeling so out of place. It’s far more mature discussions from people who have been through what you have. Seriously, when you get pregnant I can almost guarantee you’ll feel out of place with all the “omg preggers you guys” and other immature chatter from the majority of women in your birth club. I tried posting a question about symptoms relating to cramping and it was totally ignored in favor of threads like “don’t call my baby a fetus” and “stupidest baby names”. It’s like infertile women have an air of class and maturity about them that most women don’t. So when it’s time for you to graduate, come visit us on reddit!

I still haven’t made my pregnancy “facebook public”. The only people that know are my close circle of friends, my family, and 2 female coworkers. My next scan is a week from Thursday, and it will be the NT scan. NT scan is when they measure certain things and basically check to make sure it’s not a Down’s baby. I figure once that comes back all clear I’ll make it public. In the same post I also plan to announce my infertility struggles. Sort of an olive branch to the girls on my facebook that are suffering quietly. They need to know this baby did not come easy, unlike a majority of facebook babies. Maybe I’ll post something like:

“This didn’t come easy. In fact it wouldn’t have happened at all without the help of science and modern medicine. It’s been almost 2 years in the making. 2 long and depressing years of waiting for it to be “my turn” and never having anything work out right. Seeing how easy it was for everyone else and wondering why it wasn’t happening. Apparently 12% of you will go through (or are going through) what I did, which is why I decided to announce this way. After 2 years, an uncountable number of injections both big and small, one minor surgery, and handfuls of pills, I’m finally going to be a mom.”

Who knows…

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